|Created By:||Kevin Smith|
The demon Azrael, a former Muse, warns Loki and Bartleby that the forces of Heaven and Hell are attempting to kill them, as Satan will not let them succeed where he has failed and make him look bad. Bethany's party unwittingly meet the angels on a train, where a drunk Bethany reveals her mission to Bartleby, who threatens to kill Bethany before a melee ensues, in which Bartleby and Loki are thrown off the train by Silent Bob.
Bethany learns she was chosen for the mission because she is the last relative of Jesus Christ.
The group deduces that Lucifer has as much to lose if Bartleby and Loki succeed as anyone else. Arriving at the church, they fail to persuade Cardinal Glick to cancel the celebration.
When Bartleby and Loki reach the church, Bartleby kills everyone attending the celebration. At a nearby bar, Azrael captures the heroes and explains that he is the mastermind behind the Angels' plan; he wants to destroy existence rather than spend eternity in Hell, but he needed to manipulate Bartleby and Loki, as demons cannot become human. Silent Bob kills Azrael with Cardinal Glick's blessed golf club. Serendipity tells Bethany to bless the sink, making the water in the sink holy; Jay, Rufus and Serendipity kill the Stygian Triplets by dunking their heads into the water.
The heroes reach the church before Bartleby and Loki enter. Loki's wings have been torn off by Bartleby; he is now human and decides to help them. Bartleby kills Loki and fights off Rufus, Serendipity and Bob. During an attempt to seduce Bethany, Jay mentions John Doe Jersey, a comatose patient in a hospital across the street who was attacked outside a skee ball arcade and is being kept on life support. Hoping this is God, Bethany and Bob race to the hospital. Jay shoots off Bartleby's wings with a submachine gun, turning him human.
Bethany removes the life support, allowing God to escape while inadvertently killing Bethany. In the form of a woman, God manifests at the church before a remorseful Bartleby, and kills him with the power of Her voice. Silent Bob shows up with Bethany's blood-stained corpse. God resurrects Bethany and conceives a child inside her. The heavenly beings return to Heaven, leaving Bethany, Jay and Bob to reflect on events.